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An Accidental Sufi
Learning to walk the true path of love
Yes, that’s me...an accidental Sufi. I never thought I’d be updating my website to talk about my love of God and wanting to share that and spiritual healing with others.
This part of my path began several years ago during one of the darkest times in my life. Despite my having over 20 years in recovery in 12 step program, people, places and things presented themselves in a uniquely painful manner that immobilized me. It became a strange and confusing path as I sought spiritual knowledge and truth if only to relieve my pain. I knew that it was a spiritual issue because I could no longer control my life through my ego and willpower. God was showing me the way. I just had to ask for help and I did.
I have been learning how to love.
I actually was never taught. I learned to keep everyone at a distance because of my fear of being hurt. And I always had to be in control. Now this all makes sense coming from where I came from but nothing prepared me for the desperation, loneliness, and neediness of my pain. I can point to what happened that may have caused it. Several losses in my life, hormones, etc. but I think that it was a lifetime accumulation of faulty thinking, defenses, ego in control and no deep spiritual life. I had intellectualized God and thought I was "spiritual" until I found myself feeling inconsolable.
I never intended to be here but here I am - an accidental Sufi loving God.
Thank you for your visit on your own path and if you’d like some company, all you have to do is ask.
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